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I am a daughter, a sister, a grand daughter, a niece, a cousin, a friend. I am a partner, a student, a young girl and a grown woman. I am confident and scared, terrified and excited. I am loving and caring and thoughtful and hopeful.I am sick and tired. I am shy and friendly and careful and careless. I am broken and whole . I am misunderstood, misguided and mislead. i am hardworking and determined but a little scared on the inside. I wish on stars and dream my dreams. I pray to god and cry my tears. I'm smiling on the outside while I'm dying on the inside. I listen to others who won't listen to me. I walk on eggshells and I walk on fire. I believe in passion but not true love. I love you and I push you away. I want you but not so close. I am everything and nothing all at once. And all I want is for you to love me.
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Meet Koike Teppei
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travel around the world
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로페즈제시카 마리 aka anjhelrheixza

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Editor:Jacque
Layout:Qing
Inspiration: Jie Ji | Cynna
Betrayal
Written at Saturday, January 30, 2010 | back to top

Betrayal
by Dan McDonald

An echo fades into the night,
an eerie mournful sound.
A shooting star disappears from sight,
and I crumble to the ground.
There is no life within this garden;
my sobs are the only sound.
I have poisoned the honeyed fountain
where your love could be found.

Dazed, I stare at the stars above,
my grieving howls fill the night!
Unintended betrayal of love
has hidden you from my sight.
I remember how it used to be
when we shared our fears and delights.
You are a treasured friend to me.
How can I make things right?

Feeling afraid, cold and lonely,
I long to tell you how I feel,
but you don't want to hear me.
The pain for you is much too real.
Should I back away and build a wall
and block away how I feel?
Or, should I give you a call?
We both need some time to heal.

An echo fades into the night
as our friendship disappears.
How do I know what is right?
How can I ease my fears?
If I do call you again,
would the old wounds reappear?
I can't stand to cause you pain.
Hurting you again is my worst fear!


4:46 AM |
Apology
Written at Thursday, January 21, 2010 | back to top

How do I tell you I'm sorry -
With a gesture, a look, a touch?
How is it I never realized
I hurt you so very much?

I do not ask forgiveness,
A comfort I'll never deserve.
I merely want to let you know,
But I cannot find the nerve.

To finally confront you, face-to-face,
To look you in the eye,
To face your wrath, your apathy -
Too terrified to try.

You called me selfish, I turned away,
I festered and I fled;
Cutting and wounding and lashing out,
Just to see if you bled.

Betraying and deceiving you,
I surely had no right
To snatch away such a precious gem;
A dark thief in the night.

Four years and forever passed
To bring us to this day,
When I present these simple words
I never thought to say.

The time has come, it's long past due,
To put aside my fear;
Would this confession torture you,
Or have you longed to hear?

To hear those two forbidden words,
To vanquish all the pain,
To understand my dearest wish:
To know you once again.

The years aged me remarkably,
Though they have not made me wise;
I do know I erred irrevocably -
For that I apologize.

3:03 AM |
˩σƨιиɢ Δ Ƥιɛcɛ Ѳғ Ѧʏ Ƨσʋℓ
Written at Tuesday, January 19, 2010 | back to top

Losing A Piece Of My Soul
I came to you the hour I was in pain
Looking for answers, I cried to you in vain.

I shared the many skeletons hiding in my heart,
I knew then you'd be my friend,
I knew it from the start.

Troubles ran like rivers, flowing through my life,
You picked the pieces up and help me through my strife.

When home wasn't home to me no more,
You opened up your heart, and opened up the door.

We cried into night until the early morn.
We solaced each other's pain and shared our many thorns.

As time flew, the air grew thick,
I saw our friendship fading, and my heart grew sick.

The day had arrived,
When it was time to say goodbye.

Now I sit alone,
reminiscing the past I'd blown.

9:01 PM |
˩σƨт αи∂ ғσʋи∂
Written at | back to top

Lost And Found
There is a storm in my heart
It tears my inside apart
I am bleeding and I am hurt
Like a wingless little bird

Then it turns dark
And for a moment I see
The pain that was inside of me
And on a journey I embark

In search of answers
In search of truth
In search of understanding
In search of you

My guiding star in darkness
Like a little stream in the desert
Everything about you seems flawless
But that is what causes the hurt

Your perfect features do not belong to me
You do not deserve my chains
You need to live and see
What it means to be free

So spread your wings and fly away
For I can not fulfill your dream
But if you should fall one day
I'll guide you and be that little stream

So go and discover it all
And know that wherever you go
Whatever you do and might feel
The only thing you need to do is call

8:53 PM |
What Would Life Be
Written at | back to top

What Would Life Be
What would life be with out friends like thee
I'll tell you, like no longer being free.
Imagine what life would be so sad and blue
To go through life without that special you.
And I know we live so far away
Through the internet we are like castaways
Never get to touch or hug you for this I only pray
For some day I hope we can meet
To hug and laugh and dance to the beat
I know this would be a treat
For now this is all I see
Is my good friend here with me
Just think what life would be
Without friends like thee

8:47 PM |
Ƥιαиσ
Written at Saturday, January 16, 2010 | back to top

Piano
My soul is the piano, his words are the keys.
Together we compose, the best of symphonies.

How my soul replays his words of the day.
Like a composer writing a play.

I hear the music, as he strikes a key.
an orchestra, is what I see.

Two soul that share a common ground.
a friendship they have found.

What is a piano, without the player.
It's like a soul, without a desire.

It sits alone in the dark,
waiting for someone to light a spark.

A hope or a desire,
waiting for someone to inspire.

To play a song of the heart,
a song of two souls that will never depart.

12:14 AM |
σиɛ σғ тнɛ нαρριɛƨт ∂αʏ ιи мʏ ℓιғɛ...
Written at Friday, January 15, 2010 | back to top




January 15,2010...

I saw an ♥Eclipse♥ today...It's very beautiful...I can't forget it...

3:12 AM |
ʏαннннннσσσσσσσσσσσσσσ...
Written at Wednesday, January 13, 2010 | back to top






Today..., I got two signatures again....




and I saw Mai ( She is a Japanese..). She is my friends' friend.. I also want to be her friend but I'm really shy to talk to her...because my friends want me to talk to her in Japanese language..

1:06 AM |
ωɛнɛʏʏʏ...
Written at Tuesday, January 12, 2010 | back to top




I got two signatures today for the Fourth Quarter

3:57 AM |
Ɩ'м вαcκ ɛʌɛяʏσиɛ...
Written at Sunday, January 10, 2010 | back to top






Sorry again for the late post...uhhmmm...although it's already January 10, 2010...I still want to greet you a Happy New Year...

12:22 AM |